Psalm
26:2 (NASB) says “Examine
me, O Lord, and try me; Test my mind and my heart.”
BEFORE
TAKING THIS
QUICK
TEST,
PLEASE
HEED
THESE TWO WARNINGS:
1.
We
encourage you to share this test with your spouse. But, if
you are currently having tensions in your marriage, don’t take this
test together or discuss your conclusions except in the presence of a
wise Christian pastor or marriage
counselor.
2.
As you reply, concentrate on yourself, not on your spouse.
IF
YOU TRULY
DESIRE
A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE,
ASK
YOURSELF THE
FOLLOWING
QUESTIONS:
1.
Are you patient with your spouse (when he/she is doing something
they really enjoy like
shopping or playing golf, etc,)?
2.
Are you kind to him/her with your tongue? (Or do you put him/her
down face to face or behind their back?)
3.
Are you jealous or envious of your spouse? (Is there any freedom or
success of his/hers that you resent?)
4.
Are you “boastful” (loud-mouthed)? (Do you shout angrily at
your spouse when you are frustrated?)
5.
Are you proud (vain)? (Do you feel that the world should revolve
around you?)
6.
Are you haughty, selfish or rude? (Blunt
words often have the sharpest edges. Do you cut your spouse off in
mid sentence to fire back a blunt word or unkind statement? Do you
constantly interrupt him/her? Do you ever tell him/ her to shut up
or swear at them?)
7.
Do you always demand your own way? (Is your idea of marriage a
master-slave relationship? Or a parent-child relationship, where
your spouse ought to do everything for you?)
8.
Are you irritable or touchy? (How do you speak to your spouse when
he/she interrupts your point of concentration? Do
you lose your temper, or do you give him/her the attention they need?
How much of your body language shows him/her your disapproval of
lack of love?)
9.
Do you refuse
to forgive your
spouse
when he/she
sins against you (commits adultery, etc.)? Matthew
6:14-15 (NASB) says “For
if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father
will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your
Father will not forgive your transgressions.”
10.
Are you ever glad (secretly or otherwise) when your spouse is
treated unfairly? (Are you ever happy at the thought of your spouse
having an unpleasant experience that “serves
him/her right”?)
11.
Are you glad when truth wins out? (Do you accept the fact that
he/she might be right about some things, and you might be wrong? How
do you feel when that happens?
12.
Are you loyal to your spouse? (Do you flirt with others or pay any
attention to their flirting with you? Are you allowing any other
human or things to shove your spouse into second place?)
13.
Do you always trust
your spouse and believe he/she will do the right thing? If
“No”, you need to have a serious discussion and establish some
rules.
14.
Do you always stand your ground in defense of your spouse? (Do you
quickly order your children, regardless of their age, to apologize if
they are rude to your spouse? Do you ever let anyone talk negatively
about your spouse without defending him/her?)
DANGER
– ROUGH ROAD AHEAD!
15.
Do you discuss your anger toward your spouse or details of your
intimate relationship with your spouse with others (parents,
siblings, girlfriend, buddies, etc.)? If you are doing this, stop it
now!
Why?
Because you and your spouse may have had a heated argument or fight
and have made up but, because you told these others, they will still
be angry at your spouse and may continue to make negative statements
about him/her. Then, you’ll become angry with them every time they
say something negative about your spouse.
Your
anger with your spouse or details of your intimate relationship
should only be discussed with your spouse, God, or a wise
Christian pastor or marriage
counselor,
if
necessary.
THE
END RESULT
If
you have taken this “Quick
Test”,
been honest with your answers, and made
the appropriate changes,
you will be on your way to having a much happier spouse, greatly
improving your marriage, and
more peace in your home.
In
our next post, we will present 12 Communication
Guidelines
for a successful marriage.
End
Of Post
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appreciate your sharing it with others. Thanks and
God Bless.